Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
April 17, 2021, 08:35:45 pm

Login with username, password and session length

  • Total Members: 137
  • Latest: Jase
  • Total Posts: 69
  • Total Topics: 37
  • Online Today: 11
  • Online Ever: 182
  • (October 31, 2018, 04:06:02 am)
Users Online
Users: 0
Guests: 1
Total: 1


Welcome to the Sane Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people who have mental health issues, their friends and family and others with questions about mental wellness. Check in frequently to read what others have to say, post your comments, and hopefully learn more about how you can reach your own health goals.

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Author Topic: After 20 yrs. Tired of Partner only being Negative  (Read 11719 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.


  • Newbie
  • Posts: 1
After 20 yrs. Tired of Partner only being Negative
« on: November 13, 2009, 11:02:36 pm »
 :(I'm trying to start a new consulting biz because Wall St. and the Housing Mkt. were gracious enough to take my retirement monies far, far away.  What I'm realizing that Whatever I attempt to do, my partner ALWAYS takes the position of Devil's Advocate, whether he knows anything or not about what I'm doing.  This is Very Depressing after having survived a Mother (dad was there but totally invisible) who never thought anything or anyone I knew or did was worthy--even though I aced everything, was in college while going to high school-you know the pattern, doing everything right, hoping for that one moment of verification by first your Mom and now, hoping my partner would get off his high horse to at least say that Something I'm doing is Great (and I'm the big breadwinner in this family, including underwriting most of the education of our daughter).  I'm sick and tired of defending Everything I chose to do and his nonending attacks (mostly of stuff he knows NOTHING about) and never getting just one ounce of encouragement-whereas I've psyched out his need for appreciation and his own delusions of unworthiness and constantly go out of my way to encourage him.  I'm now resenting all the work I'm putting into this relationship to keep him reassured and Very Tired of his negativity.  Is this simply self-destructive behavior and I should jump ship (we've spent thousands and years in therapy-long ago though-and perhaps a lost has been lost in the interim), but I'm ready to cut him loose, which will be a financial disaster for him, but redeeming for me.  Any thoughts?


© 2021 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.  terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.